Detroit Rock-bottom

Here, open up your wallet and grab out that $20 bill.

Look at it.

Smell it.

Taste it.

Well, maybe not taste, but you get the picture.

What I'm trying to get at is in these rough and tumble economic
times, keep an eye on that twenty. Look at the city of Detroit; if we
all gave our $20 bill to the city of Detroit, I'm pretty sure it would
still look like trash.
But really, what do you expect? The city was led by a mayor who was
more like Bishop Don Magic Juan than Rudy Giuliani.

The biggest thing Detroit has going for it is its sports teams, and
three of them are in action this spring, and they may be playing for
more than they even know.

With their city in the deteriorating state that it's in, the success
of these teams is crucial to the stimulation of Detroit, both nationally
and worldwide.

From the Tigers to the Pistons to the Redwings, these three teams are
normally the aspirin that helps fans ease away the fall's
Lions-related migraines, but that may not be the case this year.

The Pistons stumbled into the 2009 NBA playoffs as the eighth and final
seed. With an impending match-up with LeBron James and the Cleveland
Cavaliers, the prospects of the Pistons making it to their seventh
consecutive Eastern Conference finals looks bleak.

Alright, I'll be honest; the Pistons do not have any chance of
beating the Cavaliers. No, none, nada, zero.
Anyone who's watched the team can see it; they really don't look
like they want to be out there. The team MVP over the last quarter of
the season was Will Bynum. Sure, Bynum has shown he is a legit NBA
player, but even Will Bynum knows he shouldn't be putting up better
stats then Joe Dumars golden boy, Rodney Stuckey.

The Tigers are in the same boat as the Pistons. I look at the Tigers
like when you went through puberty; they went from happy and carefree
during their trip to the World Series in 2006, but they haven't been
the same since. Nowadays they're stuck in that awkward stage where
their good offense is translating to an overly bushy mustache while the
pitching is more like a crack-filled voice.

Miguel Cabrera is good, but isn't that why they traded their entire
farm system for him? The pitching staff looks more and more like a mix
guys with talent and guys who should be playing for the West Michigan
Whitecaps.

Even the manager has lost his touch. Jim Leyland was on top of the
world following 2006, and he has done nothing but fall on his face
since. If you really look at it, Leyland has had one good year at all of
his stops: 2006 with Detroit, 1992 with Pittsburgh, and 1997 with
Florida. Other than those seasons, the skip has been underwhelming to
say the least.

The only bright spot this spring may be the Redwings. Many will tell
you the Redwings are just the NHL's version of the New York
Yankees, big spenders looking to win now.

Yes, the Wings aren't afraid to throw around money, shown by the
unquestionable Henrick Zetterberg 12-year $72 million contract and the
questionable 11-year $43 million Johan Franzen deal.

The Wings are winning with mostly players they've drafted and have
been the image teams look at for a successful team.

The biggest problem linked with these three teams is the risk of
failure. Just three years ago, the Red Wings were the NHL's Western
Conferences No. 1 seed when they were upset by the eighth-seeded
Edmonton Oilers, 4-2.

The Tigers have been in a slump of mediocrity since their trip to the
World Series, and coming into this year, the Pistons had become the
Susan Lucci of the NBA's Eastern Conference.

What Detroit needs is a W. No, that win won't come from a Stanley Cup
or World Series, but it sure would give the city the boost it needs.

So to take one out of the overly dramatic movie cliché book, this
summer those teams need to look at themselves and say forget the Gipper,
let's win one for Detroit.